This One Time in Nursing School
Updated: Sep 23, 2019
When you make the decision to go to nursing school, you realize immediately that they're strict. Like, it can get pretty intense, which I understand since you plan on taking care of human beings, sometimes in life threatening situations. Before you can even get your foot in the door, it feels like you're selling your soul.
You get the extraordinary honor to submit to random drug tests *insert sarcasm*. Everybody has peed in a cup at some point in their life for whatever the reason may be. We got all the fun of hearing our instructor say, "Nobody go to the bathroom!" followed by getting called 3 at a time. Even if you know for a fact that you haven't taken anything you shouldn't have, it still makes you a nervous wreck. So, with our nerves all over the place, we marched into the bathroom, headed into the stalls, and hoped for it to be over as soon as possible (not to mention the stall stays open while your instructors sit in front of you to watch you while you pee).
It felt like only a few days had passed since our last drug test (get ready for this bs). I woke up for school as usual and prepared my outfit for the day. I always felt like I had been run over by a Mack truck after staying up all night studying as much as possible, but I tried my best to look half way decent whenever I could. So I pull out my favorite black halter top romper and throw my jean jacket on to keep my shoulders covered (when I held the romper up, in the back of my mind I thought, "should I wear this? We might have a drug test today. Nah, we just had one. Imma go ahead and throw this on".).
I was feeling cute and confident that day. I even managed to put on a little bit of make up and my hair was on point. But I shit you not, immediately after I got to school, we heard Mrs. H call for us not to use the bathroom, it felt like my stomach was going to fall out of my ass. I seriously felt like my heart took a leap into my throat.
I tried to let it roll off of my back. I knew I wasn't going to be lucky enough to wear that outfit without getting drug tested that day. I started feeling less anxious until I grabbed my cup, took off my jacket, and untied the strings to pull the romper down. Then Mrs. B says, "you don't have to take your clothes off." I could have died. I know my face had to have been as red as a beet. I stuttered over my words but managed to tell her that it was a one piece so I had to strip my clothes off.
I thought I was never going to live that down, especially when I got home and told my mom about it (if you know Tamika, you know that she doesn't care to bust out laughing at my hilariously inconvenient situations). She says, "well at least your bra and panties matched," and she's literally gasping for air while laughing hysterically. Thomas didn't make it any better by saying, "I can't believe you'll wear matching panties and bra for Mrs. Bivens but not for me!" and then Momma starts laughing and gasping again. Now y'all see how they treat me. Thank God I never have to go through that again. I learned a very important lesson that day. It's always your own family that laughs at your embarrassment.